[ She shakes her head a little, careful not to dislodge his hand, and has to let out a soft sigh of a laugh. ]
No, there's nothing for you to be sorry about. And I don't think you could have stopped me. [ At least she knows this about herself? ] I think we'll both just have to get used to the idea that I'll cry if you get hurt. And maybe Doctor Baizhu can teach me some medicine that doesn't need my divinity.
And I'd still be able to use that, even if my divinity went away. [ She likes this idea more and more... she grins at him a little. ] It's funny. I still expect someone to tell me I can't do things. No wonder it's so easy to talk to you.
Have you? It's one of the ways you did remind me of Medea. The first time I saw her, I thought no one could be more free than she was. More strong. It took me too long to understand that she had to be that way to stand up to everything against her. That she chose... the best she could from what was left for her. It's not really the same as freedom.
[ She wonders if anyone who takes on as much responsibility as Wei Wuxian seems to can really be free. ]
Wei Wuxian doesn't say anything for a while, simply because he has no idea what to even say to that when she has once again seen right through him, picking up on things he hadn't even realized for himself. ]
I used to be quite free, but as most things, it did come to an end.
Carefree, almost to a fault. I'd forget about any transgressions against me the next day because I'd let things go so quickly. Nothing ever really brought my mood down either.
[ And then life happened and he stopped talking about his feelings. ]
I can picture it. I can still see that in you, I think.
[ In a different form now. The cheerfulness he uses to deflect things, the calm acceptance of what's in front of him. She looks up at his face and reaches up to touch his cheek lightly. ]
I think so, too. I think the strength you gained isn't wasted, but... I'd really like to see that someday. A peaceful world where you can be carefree.
[ Knowing even a fraction of what he's been through, she can't bring herself to say that she's glad for what brought them together. He would have been happier if it never happened. But, even so, they're here now. ]
Then you will. As long as we have that, we can keep moving forward.
[ It's a nice thought. She leans her head into his touch and closes her eyes, trying to picture what that would even look like. A quiet life farming somewhere? Maybe something like that. ]
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No, there's nothing for you to be sorry about. And I don't think you could have stopped me. [ At least she knows this about herself? ] I think we'll both just have to get used to the idea that I'll cry if you get hurt. And maybe Doctor Baizhu can teach me some medicine that doesn't need my divinity.
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Learning medicine would be a fantastic idea.
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[ She wonders if anyone who takes on as much responsibility as Wei Wuxian seems to can really be free. ]
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Wei Wuxian doesn't say anything for a while, simply because he has no idea what to even say to that when she has once again seen right through him, picking up on things he hadn't even realized for himself. ]
I used to be quite free, but as most things, it did come to an end.
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Five years ago, when you said things began to get worse?
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[ He sighs softly, those idle patterns bringing him a sense of calmness. ]
Believe it or not, I'm a completely different person now.
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Hardship changes people, doesn't it? What were you like before?
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[ And then life happened and he stopped talking about his feelings. ]
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[ In a different form now. The cheerfulness he uses to deflect things, the calm acceptance of what's in front of him. She looks up at his face and reaches up to touch his cheek lightly. ]
It's nice to think of you so happy.
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[ Which is all he can ask for, really. There's no taking back his experiences, or the loss of his innocence. ]
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[ Knowing even a fraction of what he's been through, she can't bring herself to say that she's glad for what brought them together. He would have been happier if it never happened. But, even so, they're here now. ]
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I think I have a good chance of finding it. Or, at least, I have hope.
[ Which he hasn't felt in a long, long time. ]
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[ It's a nice thought. She leans her head into his touch and closes her eyes, trying to picture what that would even look like. A quiet life farming somewhere? Maybe something like that. ]
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We can. I know that you’ll be able to move forward too. You’re strong enough.
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I hope so. I'll keep trying to be.
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[ He laughs. ]
Wanna take a nap? Or do you want to do something else?
[ He slides a hand to her back, drumming his fingers. It’s up to her. ]
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You're really, really sure you're feeling well enough? Because a bed might be nice...
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[ He grins. ]
I’m well enough to do anything you feel like doing in this bed.
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[ Unfortunately Kakapo has not thought to develop the sock on the door code, but Waltaquin will forgive them. Hopefully. ]
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Wei Wuxian continues to drum his fingertips along her side. ]
And what might those things be?
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[ She pauses in this train of thought, mid-appreciating how cute it is when he makes that face, to give him a tiny frown. ]
...why are you never shy about talking about these things?
[ Why is he so good at being shameless in this specific way, the one part that actually flusters her?? ]
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[ His logic makes sense on a surface level, but doesn't hold for most people beyond that, honestly.
Wei Wuxian lightly pushes her shoulder to make her move. ]
Why don't you lay back and let me take care of you?
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[ But he is a talker. Psyche laughs a little and rolls off of him onto her side, studying him in consideration for a long moment. ]
...alright. Just for a little bit.
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