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Hey! I’m not that pathetic!
[Huff puff… He’s no failure, Wei Wuxian! Just watch, he’ll get so good at dodging.]
[Huff puff… He’s no failure, Wei Wuxian! Just watch, he’ll get so good at dodging.]
I didn't say that! But if you're going to say it, that's not my problem!
[ He laughs again, laying back on the ground. Who cares if his robes get dirty anyway? ]
[ He laughs again, laying back on the ground. Who cares if his robes get dirty anyway? ]
[Ah, shit, he set himself up for that. He flushes, flailing and only barely resisting stomping in a little dumb gay baby fit.]
Sh-shut up! It’s not that funny!
Sh-shut up! It’s not that funny!
But it is!
[ He does stop laughing though, if only so he can smirk at Haruka. ]
All joking aside, the vast majority are not trained in combat. It is simply the way things are. Don't worry about being "pathetic".
[ He does stop laughing though, if only so he can smirk at Haruka. ]
All joking aside, the vast majority are not trained in combat. It is simply the way things are. Don't worry about being "pathetic".
[He crosses his arms, pouting and turning away. He doesn’t deserve to be bullied like this?!
But he does ease up after a moment, even if he’s still pouting.]
I’m not worried.
[He’s absolutely worried.]
I don’t care if I’m pathetic, I just don’t want to die yet. If there’s anything I can do, I’ll do it.
But he does ease up after a moment, even if he’s still pouting.]
I’m not worried.
[He’s absolutely worried.]
I don’t care if I’m pathetic, I just don’t want to die yet. If there’s anything I can do, I’ll do it.
[ He gets it. Wei Wuxian has done all sorts of things because he didn't want to die. That's why he doesn't continue bullying Haruka despite him being such an easy target. ]
Does that include killing someone else?
[ His tone isn't judgmental, at least. ]
Does that include killing someone else?
[ His tone isn't judgmental, at least. ]
I…
[It’s a reasonable question, but it’s not something Haruka’s ever had to actually consider before. It’s never something he’s wanted to do, even when he was at his angriest and most destructive.
But if it’s to save himself from someone who wants him dead?]
I don’t know.
[He doesn’t get the feeling Wei Wuxian would think him a monster if he said yes, and he’d probably understand if he said no, but Haruka has no idea. It’s still a concept that’s too abstract.
There’s a soft, nervous admittance though, as if Haruka is afraid voicing it will make it a real possibility.]
Maybe?
[It’s a reasonable question, but it’s not something Haruka’s ever had to actually consider before. It’s never something he’s wanted to do, even when he was at his angriest and most destructive.
But if it’s to save himself from someone who wants him dead?]
I don’t know.
[He doesn’t get the feeling Wei Wuxian would think him a monster if he said yes, and he’d probably understand if he said no, but Haruka has no idea. It’s still a concept that’s too abstract.
There’s a soft, nervous admittance though, as if Haruka is afraid voicing it will make it a real possibility.]
Maybe?
[ Oh, he didn't think he'd be putting Haruka through so much emotional turmoil. Oops. But it does give him a lot of insight into the way Haruka thinks, even if his answer is noncommittal. ]
There's no shame in falling on either side of the coin... or not knowing until the situation happens upon you.
[ He feels a little bit bad for making Haruka answer, so he'll add his own personal tidbit: ]
When I was younger, I never anticipated taking the amount of lives that I have.
There's no shame in falling on either side of the coin... or not knowing until the situation happens upon you.
[ He feels a little bit bad for making Haruka answer, so he'll add his own personal tidbit: ]
When I was younger, I never anticipated taking the amount of lives that I have.
[He doesn’t want to be someone like Ryou, who has such a casual disregard for people’s lives and sees them as playthings!
But… is his life any more valuable then anyone else’s? It’s hard to say.]
…Wei Wuxian-san…
[He’s not really sure what to say, so he just flops onto the ground next to him and pulls his knees to his chest.]
I’m sorry. I’ll… do my best, so you don’t have to do anything for me, and…
[He trails off, shaking his head.]
But… is his life any more valuable then anyone else’s? It’s hard to say.]
…Wei Wuxian-san…
[He’s not really sure what to say, so he just flops onto the ground next to him and pulls his knees to his chest.]
I’m sorry. I’ll… do my best, so you don’t have to do anything for me, and…
[He trails off, shaking his head.]
[ Wei Wuxian tsks at him before patting him on the back. ]
Don't think of it that way. Do your best for yourself. Whether or not I do anything for you is my choice and has no bearing on your choices.
Don't think of it that way. Do your best for yourself. Whether or not I do anything for you is my choice and has no bearing on your choices.
[The best for himself…
When’s the last time he even thought about that?]
You seem like an expert in things like this.
[Which is?? Mildly alarming?]
When’s the last time he even thought about that?]
You seem like an expert in things like this.
[Which is?? Mildly alarming?]
In killing?
[ Well. ]
To be fair, I did participate in a war.
[ Well. ]
To be fair, I did participate in a war.
[ LMFAO ]
I have killed outside of the war, but it's only ever been for personal grudges.
[ He doesn't kill indiscriminately, he swears. ]
I have killed outside of the war, but it's only ever been for personal grudges.
[ He doesn't kill indiscriminately, he swears. ]
Personal grudges...
[looks back at ryou.........................................
hm,
why does he keep meeting people totally down with murder?]
This all paints a very odd picture of you, Wei Wuxian-san.
[looks back at ryou.........................................
hm,
why does he keep meeting people totally down with murder?]
This all paints a very odd picture of you, Wei Wuxian-san.
Does it? What's the image you have of me then?
[ He's genuinely curious. But don't worry, Haruka, you can't hurt his feelings if it's not nice. ]
[ He's genuinely curious. But don't worry, Haruka, you can't hurt his feelings if it's not nice. ]
…You care enough to offer to protect me, and to train me so I can defend myself, but you seem flippant over killing people yourself or what happens to them. It’s like you’re kind and compassionate but distant and callous at the same time.
[And he doesn’t know what he’s done to earn that concern besides be hopeless.]
[And he doesn’t know what he’s done to earn that concern besides be hopeless.]
[ ........he's been read for filth
It actually takes Wei Wuxian a second or two to respond. ]
You aren't wrong. In fact, you're quite perceptive, Haruka. I had no choice but to develop that callousness during the war, and it's stuck with me sense. It's impossible to get rid of once you have it.
It actually takes Wei Wuxian a second or two to respond. ]
You aren't wrong. In fact, you're quite perceptive, Haruka. I had no choice but to develop that callousness during the war, and it's stuck with me sense. It's impossible to get rid of once you have it.
You had to do what you can to survive, and... sometimes when you're hurt, you can't always heal.
[Which... maybe he's making some assumptions, there, but wars are terrible things. There's so much loss, and danger, and things you don't want to be done but you have to for your survival...
Which isn't something Haruka can relate to, and it's something he knows he can't. For a brief moment, he feels almost guilty, like he should be doing more for Wei Wuxian then he already is, like there's some burden he has to help him with, but...
That's awful presumptuous, isn't it? Haruka isn't anyone that important, or special, and he can't change anything about what Wei Wuxian has and will deal with in his life.]
But... maybe it's for the best to not be entirely soft-hearted, if you're not sure how safe you can be. I don't think being callous and protecting yourself makes you a bad person, Wei Wuxian-san.
[Which... maybe he's making some assumptions, there, but wars are terrible things. There's so much loss, and danger, and things you don't want to be done but you have to for your survival...
Which isn't something Haruka can relate to, and it's something he knows he can't. For a brief moment, he feels almost guilty, like he should be doing more for Wei Wuxian then he already is, like there's some burden he has to help him with, but...
That's awful presumptuous, isn't it? Haruka isn't anyone that important, or special, and he can't change anything about what Wei Wuxian has and will deal with in his life.]
But... maybe it's for the best to not be entirely soft-hearted, if you're not sure how safe you can be. I don't think being callous and protecting yourself makes you a bad person, Wei Wuxian-san.
[ Wei Wuxian doesn’t say anything at all for a few long seconds, trying to process everything Haruka just said. ]
…I’d like to think I’m not, and while there’s a lot that you don’t know about me, perhaps it does say something that you think that about me at all.
[ Haruka is wiser than Wei Wuxian gave him credit for… maybe he should stop making so many assumptions. ]
I’ve made the choices I have made because I believe them to be the right thing to do. While I’ve never doubted it… the support is nice.
[ He doesn’t have much of it. ]
…I’d like to think I’m not, and while there’s a lot that you don’t know about me, perhaps it does say something that you think that about me at all.
[ Haruka is wiser than Wei Wuxian gave him credit for… maybe he should stop making so many assumptions. ]
I’ve made the choices I have made because I believe them to be the right thing to do. While I’ve never doubted it… the support is nice.
[ He doesn’t have much of it. ]
[He's sure the things he's done don't hold a candle to the things Wei Wuxian has done or been through, but...
He would hate it if someone had given up on him, just for that. It would make it harder to stand himself.]
I'm not sure if all of that matters - I mean. Of course it does, but...
[He hugs his legs a bit tighter, resting his head against his knees as he looks at Wei Wuxian.]
You made your choices and you're living with them, but that's not all that will make you good or bad. There's always the days ahead of us, too. And while we're here, I can support you with them, if... if you want me to! Of course, if you don't want that all that much, that's fine. It's whatever.
[tsuns]
He would hate it if someone had given up on him, just for that. It would make it harder to stand himself.]
I'm not sure if all of that matters - I mean. Of course it does, but...
[He hugs his legs a bit tighter, resting his head against his knees as he looks at Wei Wuxian.]
You made your choices and you're living with them, but that's not all that will make you good or bad. There's always the days ahead of us, too. And while we're here, I can support you with them, if... if you want me to! Of course, if you don't want that all that much, that's fine. It's whatever.
[tsuns]
[ That little attitude briefly reminds him of home and he has to hold back a laugh, because even someone like Wei Wuxian knows when laughter is wholly inappropriate. After a long silence with a slight frown on his face, he does allow himself a smile at least. ]
Ah, bold words, Haruka. [ A pause. ] Well, right up until the end, that is.
[ But that's enough bullying. Haruka was sincere in his offer, so Wei Wuxian should show some of that sincerity back. ]
If you're willing to offer support, then sure. Let's support one another, shall we?
Ah, bold words, Haruka. [ A pause. ] Well, right up until the end, that is.
[ But that's enough bullying. Haruka was sincere in his offer, so Wei Wuxian should show some of that sincerity back. ]
If you're willing to offer support, then sure. Let's support one another, shall we?
[Wow! He’s got a reputation to upkeep and if he’s sincere, he’ll probably get made fun of! Though he’s already getting made fun of, so what does he have to lose.]
Shut up.
[There no heat to it, just whiny pouting.]
Supporting each other… that sounds better then it just being me relying on you.
Shut up.
[There no heat to it, just whiny pouting.]
Supporting each other… that sounds better then it just being me relying on you.
[ That “shut up” just makes him laugh. ]
Then we’ll go with that.
[ He grins. ]
I get into trouble, just so you know. That doesn’t mean you have to follow me into it.
Then we’ll go with that.
[ He grins. ]
I get into trouble, just so you know. That doesn’t mean you have to follow me into it.
I'll do whatever I want to do, okay? I don't mind some trouble.
[Still, he's... a little bit relieved, after this conversation, and starts unfolding himself from how he's been curled up.]
I should... head to my cabana. Thank you, Wei Wuxian-san.
[Still, he's... a little bit relieved, after this conversation, and starts unfolding himself from how he's been curled up.]
I should... head to my cabana. Thank you, Wei Wuxian-san.
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